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November 11, 2013

Motivational Monday: If you have a dream be careful who you share it with


I've been thinking a lot about sharing

About how it's so natural to us as people to communicate, to talk and share

And in the midst of all this thinking, I did just that...I shared and learnt a valuable lesson.



So last week Monday, I was out at an event and at the end we had a bit of networking and I got talking to a girl that I met. We were both talking about a few of the dreams that we had and want to achieve. After I had shared a little of what I wanted to do with her, she just started discouraging me, quoting statistics and pushing me to start small.

After the event was over and I was heading home on the tube I realised I was feeling really confused and felt a little deflated. I started questioning my idea and wondering if I should go ahead or not.

I would like to say I immediately bounced back but sadly I continued feeling like this for a couple of days... then I came across a quote that said "Success is 80% mindset and 20% of what you actually do". That was when it hit me.... It wasn't about what she thought, it was about what I believed.


I realised that whilst she thought she was being helpful, she was actually imposing her own self doubts onto me and even worse I was letting it happen.

So what is the valuable lesson I learnt in all this and decided to share with you guys? See how I brought this whole thing back to sharing...

1.   Well the first lesson is that when you have something you believe in and want to do, often times
       that belief will be challenged and it's up to you to fight for what you believe in.

2.   Lesson two, is that when your idea is challenged, reflect on what the person has said and see if it's a      concern or point of view that you need to take on board. If so, learn from it and see what changes
     you need to make.

3.   Lesson three is one of my favourite new statements, if after you think about what they have said            and you find you don't agree with it or feel the person is possibly trying to drag you down just think 
    "who on earth asked you?" 

4.  The final lesson is to be careful who you share your dreams with, for they will either bring you up or      bring you down.  Find and surround yourself with people who will support, strengthen and 
     encourage you to keep reaching for your dreams....

Have a lovely week ahead.

x

P.s You will be please to know that I have fully bounced back and am going ahead with all my plans with a renewed belief. 

Have you ever had something similar happen to you? Let me know in the comments below and share how you dealt with it.

Motivational Monday posts are posted every other Monday.

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8 comments:

Leillah Sekalala said...

I thought I would share my experiences in the early days at NoScrunchie. I remember in the early days sharing with someone my idea and she asked me if it was a hobby and if I had considered doing research before I started out!!! Then I later shared with excitement to this person who turned up for an interview and it turns out she was working with competitors. Bottom line, don't share!

lotionspotionsandme said...

Oh really?! It's amazing how many people can have an agenda.... that's horrible. I would like to believe I can still share but be a lot more selective on who I share with in the future. x

Halima Bepo said...

I’ve learnt the hard way who i share my ideas with. i realised the more I shared my ideas the less I wanted to go ahead with them because 90% of the time i was being discouraged by others ( your’re right other peoples opinion really really makes you doubt your ideas). These days I just go ahead with my plans and let my work speak for me.

i really love your motivational monday posts.

Thank you xx

lotionspotionsandme said...

They do don't they, I guess the only positive is if it pushes you to become even more convicted about your idea.

Thank you so so much, I really appreciate the comment about my MM posts. :-)

Let me know if there are ever any topics you would like me to cover. xx

Clare Nichols said...

I think you're so right Segun. I try to surround myself with 'radiators' rather than 'drains' - people who give me energy rather than people who drain energy from me.

Mathy Lisika-Minsende said...

Sometimes the people we share our ideas with can dissapoint us, even discourage us out of our ideas because of their personal fear. But that's just what it is, their personal fear. I would learn to share with people you trust and those who are moving in the same direction as you. Other fellow business owners that make you feel comfortable.

lotionspotionsandme said...

I love that phrase Clare, "surrounding ourselves with radiators rather than drainers"

lotionspotionsandme said...

Thanks Mathy, you are so right a lot of the time it is their own personal fear

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