Talking to a couple of friends recently, I
came to the realisation that many times especially as women, we allow ourselves
to be defined either by our circumstances or as others define us. For example
as a friend, sister, girlfriend, wife, mother etc. or by our jobs and whether
or not we have achieved certain things in life.
I had coffee with a friend the other day,
and this friend is an amazing woman who I admire both for her heart, tenacity
and just for who she is. She is in her late 30’s and isn’t married or dating
anyone, and was having a hard time because she would like to be in a
relationship and also because her parents had expressed their extreme
disappointment about her not being married
They felt that the fact she wasn’t married
was her fault and was bringing a form of (these were their words) “disgrace and
shame to their whole family” I sat with this amazing friend of mine and tried
to encourage her as she asked me if there was something wrong with her. No
there was nothing wrong with her, yes she wasn’t in a relationship but that
doesn’t define her, make her less of a person, bring shame on her family or
stop her enjoying her life in her current season.
